Short Jokes

Doctor, I’m coughing and breathing hard.
– Do you smoke cigarettes?
– I smoke, but it doesn’t help!

Doctors have two diagnoses:
– It’s nothing.
– What have you been waiting for until now!

– “Don’t you ever feel the need to take a bath?”, said doctor to patient.
– “I feel it, doctor, but I can control my feelings.”

All over the world, alcoholism is a disease.
Only in Russia they ask you:
– Why don’t you drink? Are you sick?

Mom, I don’t like cheese with holes! – says son.
– You eat the cheese, but leave the holes – replied mom.

An inmate came to the prison library looking for a book. The librarian answers him:
– We don’t have that book, but we have the author!